So, you're thinking of getting married! 

Or maybe you've already decided and set the date? Congratulations!  

Planning a wedding can be daunting enough but if you do not set aside some time, in plenty of time, to consider the realities of life after the wedding day you could find things rather more difficult than you had hoped.  For instance, every couple has areas of incompatibility or disagreement that they will never resolve. Avoiding discussion or conflict is not a solution. Successful couples learn ways of communicating and handling conflict that actually strengthen their relationship and improve intimacy. Following a marriage preparation programme will offer an opportunity for you to learn how to do that. (There is more general information about marrying in the Catholic Church at http://catholicweddinghelp.com)

The Leeds Diocesan Marriage Preparation Programme.

The overview below is designed to give you some insight into what the Leeds Diocesan Marriage Preparation Programme contains.  For a leaflet about this Programme click here. (For other resources scroll down)

Your priest must always be your first point of contact for everything to do with both your wedding and your marriage preparation. To find out if your parish, or deanery, offers this or any other marriage preparation programme for engaged couples in your area contact your parish priest.

Pope John Paul II said that marriage preparation must be:

Serious in purpose

Adequate in length

Excellent in content

and obligatory by nature.

Responses to our Diocesan Marriage Preparation Programme from presenters and engaged couples suggest that it satisfies the first three! To read what a local reporter did after attending one of our courses click here.

The course is presented as a programme of 6 modules. The structured course may suit the needs of your parish as it stands; alternatively you may wish to be more flexible and adapt it to a longer or shorter period. Doing the six modules in four sessions over four consecutive weeks is recommended. The focus is on preparation for the life-long commitment of Marriage. Planning the wedding liturgy requires a separate meeting with the presiding priest.

Module 1. What's it all about?
Marriage and family life are the basis of society.
The Church recognises this and also realises how much change there has been in society in recent decades, which has put marriage under pressure.

In 2004 Pope John Paul II asked that "the Church seek to offer better pre-marital instruction aimed at forming couples in this vocation". This course is designed to do just that - to help couples preparing for marriage to make sure that they understand as fully as possible the commitment they are making.

The main purpose is to ensure that you have talked to each other about all aspects of marriage and to be aware of the commitment you are making – to each other and to God and the wider community.
In this introductory session we will be looking at a number of issues, some of which we will be covering in detail later in the course.

Module 2: Who we are and where we've come from (looking at personality and family background)

Module 3: How do we communicate? (exercises in communication skills)

Module 4: How to manage conflict and stay friends (understanding, accepting and managing conflict)

Module 5: The gifts of sexuality and intimacy in marriage (including thinking about children)

Module 6: Sharing the spirit - living the sacrament (how the church understands marriage)

Marriage is a continuous and changing process. To meet the needs of these changes there is further support for you in programmes for married couples like ‘Couple Alive’.  Roll the mouse over 'Marriage' to find the enrichment section which contains something about enrichment as well as support for marriages in difficulties; also - where to go to find out more about Natural Family Planning. You will find parenting support and faith support if you look in the 'Parenting' and 'Family Spirituality' sections.

NOTE

Parish Priests are responsible for ensuring that all couples getting married in the Catholic Church have adequate preparation.  To support priests who want to develop lay ministry to engaged couples in their own parishes Free training is offered every year to people nominated by their parish priest. Please see your parish priest for marriage preparation or if you would like to support him in providing marriage preparation. Then contact us at flm@flm.org.uk

Other Marriage Preparation Resources

Click here for a copy of a leaflet with details of a range of different Marriage Preparation resources which are available to clergy and lay ministers. There are many more resources available to you and to your parish priest to help with preparation for marriage. Most are not Catholic but are Christian. 2-in-2-1 has a good collection to look at http://www.2-in-2-1.co.uk/weddings/marlifeprep/resmarprep/ 

Also see:

www.catholicmarriageprepclass.com